K. A. Laity

CHARACTERS

OTHER timid.

ONE Slightly less timid.


SETTING
Uncertain.


TIME
Elastic.


[Seated on a rock on an otherwise empty stage, OTHER and ONE side by side. ONE is reading the Book.]


OTHER: Are you done yet?

ONE: Just this bit more.

[Silence except perhaps for OTHER’S impatient tapping while ONE finishes reading. At last ONE closes the book with some satisfaction, sighs and hands it over to OTHER.]

OTHER: Thanks.

[immediately starts reading while standing, pacing a little]

ONE: [chin on hands] Do you ever wonder—?

OTHER: Shhh!

ONE: [softer] Do you ever wonder—?

OTHER: I’m trying to read!

ONE: I know that, but don’t you think we should talk about it?

OTHER: No! Now, shhhh.

[OTHER is silent for a while, but occasionally looking over at ONE who stares into space.]

Do you think we should -- you know, talk about it?

ONE: [a little petulant] Not if you don’t want to—

OTHER: It’s not -- I didn’t say -- it’s just I need to finish this bit.

ONE: Go ahead. I won’t interrupt.

[ONE stares off into the distance again. OTHER keeps looking up from reading, distracted.]

OTHER: [finally closing book] Well!

ONE: Well?

OTHER: I thought you wanted to talk about it?

ONE: Only if you do.

OTHER: Oh, don’t be like that. What did you think?

ONE: I’m not sure.

OTHER: Did you like the—?

ONE: Well, yes, of course.

OTHER: Really?

ONE: Oh, you didn’t?

OTHER: I never said that.

ONE: But you looked somewhat—

OTHER: Well, you have to admit—

ONE: I don’t see that at all.

OTHER: Well, maybe it’s just me.

ONE: Oh, here we go again.

OTHER: What do you mean?

ONE: It just always comes back to this.

OTHER: I never—

ONE: Oh, but you always do.

OTHER: Not true! You’re just jumping to conclusions because I said—

ONE: But you didn’t even say, you just always imply—

OTHER: No, you always infer -- and not always from what I actually say.

ONE: Perhaps if you ever finished a sentence—

OTHER: I wouldn’t because you always interrupt.

ONE: I’d never, it’s you who inevitably—

OTHER: And there, that’s another one, “inevitably,” as if I never change.

ONE: Do you though? Do any of us?

OTHER: I do.

ONE: [laughs] Suddenly you’re all certainty.

OTHER: [shrugs] I can be when I want to be.

ONE: But not when I want you to be.

OTHER: Ah ha! So this is about you.

ONE: I just wanted to know what you thought about it—

OTHER: Well, let me finish.
[reads a bit longer, eventually closes book]

ONE: All right, all right -- well, then?

OTHER: [pause] Did you like it?

ONE: Ha!

OTHER: No, really -- I thought I did at first—

ONE: Until it—

OTHER: Yeah, and then I began to wonder—

ONE: So did I! It wasn’t very true to life then, was it?

OTHER: Is that a good measure?

ONE: As good as any, don’t you think?

OTHER: I’m not too sure. [beat] What if it’s true to life, but it’s not the life we’ve lived?

[they look at each other, look at audience, then suddenly look away to opposite sides]

ONE: I once—

OTHER: What?

ONE: Oh, nothing.

[silence for a few beats]

OTHER: It’s only a book, right?

ONE: [laughs] Why were we reading it anyway?

OTHER: You know, it was recommended by—

ONE: Oh, that’s right.

OTHER: She thought it was very—

ONE: Well, she would.

[both chuckle]

Not that it matters anyway.

OTHER: No, no -- we’re perfectly happy, right?

ONE: Perfect. [pause] What a word. A state of being perfect. Without a flaw.

OTHER: [shifting uncomfortably] Well, in a manner of speaking, I suppose.

ONE: Can we be without a flaw ‘in a manner of speaking’?

OTHER: I was only saying—

ONE: Yes.

OTHER: What?

ONE: Oh, let’s not argue.

OTHER: Who’s arguing?

ONE: I know.

OTHER: Know what? It’s not as if—

ONE: But it is, you know.

OTHER: I just wanted to share the experience.

ONE: Experience?

OTHER: Well, you know what I mean—

ONE: I suppose.

OTHER: What now?

ONE: It’s nothing.

OTHER: It is, or you wouldn’t say that.

ONE: I said, it’s nothing.

OTHER: It never is when you say that.

ONE: Well, don’t magnify it.

OTHER: Ooh, ‘magnify’! Nice word that. Very appropriate.

ONE: Are you trying to be ironic?

OTHER: Yes.

ONE: Don’t.

OTHER: Why?

ONE: Well, it doesn’t suit you.

OTHER: I think it suits me down to the ground.

ONE: Wow, that’s quite an original expression.

OTHER: You’re doing it again.

ONE: What?

OTHER: Arguing.

ONE: It’s that damn book.

OTHER: It was supposed to make us feel better, she said.

ONE: She was so very wrong.

OTHER: I think it’s the book that’s wrong.

ONE: You don’t think it’s…us?

OTHER: [holding up book] No—look. Even the binding’s cheap.

ONE: If it were really worth something—

OTHER: Of course, but—

ONE: You’re right. I don’t know what I was thinking—

OTHER: We were thinking.

ONE: Chuck it.

OTHER: [surprised laugh] Right here?

ONE: Yes, chuck it.

OTHER: [Throws it on the ground in front of ONE. Both stare at it for a few beats.] Good riddance, eh?

ONE: Yes. [exchanged looks, then both staring at the book a little longer]

OTHER: Let’s go.

ONE: Yes.
[They do not, however, move immediately. Eventually OTHER steps up to take ONE’s hand.]

OTHER: Let’s go.

ONE: Yes.

[This time they go, albeit slowly. They stop when OTHER is off stage, ONE still on, eventually stretching the linked hands between them. ONE looks back at the book lying on the floor.]

Stupid book.

[Pause for a few more beats, staring at the book, and finally exit.]

CURTAIN